MIGHTY WANDERERS CC VS THE WHALERS 13 July 2003, Burbage Road, Dulwich.
WHALERS
BATSMAN HOW OUT BOWLER RUNS
V D Pump Lbw Hartley 20
Judo Ret'd Hurt 50
Osbourn Ct Mortimer Stuart 5
Hall Bwld Smith 0
Nelson Lbw Smith 13
Todd Ct Winter Sozi 0
Williams Ct Winter Stuart 103
Kirkness Bwld Sozi 8
Duckfreis Ct Sozi Maddison 35
Gamble Ct Murdo Mathias 1
? N/O 0
EXTRAS 12
TOTAL 247 All out      
WANDERERS
BATSMAN HOW OUT BOWLER RUNS
Smith Bwld Gamble 8
Maddison Ct Todd 13
Sozi Stmp Vanderpump 36
B Page Ct Murdo (sub) Todd 1
Winter Ct Wkt Hall 44
Mathias Stmp Vanderpump 1
Mortimer Ct Gamble 30
Stuart Bwld Kirkness 11
Hartley Stmp Gamble 0
Kelly Bwld Kirkness 0
Montgomery N/O 0
EXTRAS 33
TOTAL 177 All Out
Whalers won by 70 runs.
Man of the match: John Mortimer
BOWLER OVERS MAIDENS RUNS W'KTS
Montgomery 2 0 26 0
Kelly 4 0 30 0
Stuart 7 1 26 2
Hartley 7 1 56 1
L Smith 4 1 24 2
Sozi 4 0 37 2
Winter 5 0 27 0
B Page 3 0 17 0
Maddison 1 0 6 1
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Match Report
By 'Wildman'

WUFF'S WOEFUL WANDERERS WILT IN WHALERS WHITEWASH

An optimistically wide ranging map reference led to the Wanderers converging on South London to different parts of Dulwich, all looking for the same pitch. Due to modern technology and semaphore signals the Wanders duly arrived at the Dulwich dustbowl.

Sensing an advantage Wuff lost the toss and surprisingly in 90 degree temperatures the Whalers decided to bat. The Whalers blazed off at around 9 runs an over - and all minds went back to last year when the opposition lost only a couple of wickets. However the Skipper made an inspired bowling change and eschewing normal methods Bongo decided that attack was needed. Aiming for the bottom of Judos bat, he persuaded him to hit his own chin. A and E proved the winner.

The Wanderers then stuck a rich vein of form and took five wickets (including two from Paul who abandoned the Barnes Wallace approach and terrorised the batsmen with full tosses and well pitched up deliveries) before encountering the sturdy form of the Welsh Blacksmith Williams. Devastation then followed - there were continuous visits to the boundary, to the road and to the nearby church - both to retrieve the ball and to pray for salvation.

The Wanderers fielding took a turn for the worse - and unusually for this razor sharp fielding side catches were dropped, misfielding became prevalent and there were many Swedish outbursts about the state of the outfield, Abba and the price of herrings in Stockholm.

Just when 300 seemed a possibility the frontline attack of Maddison and Mathias came in to blow away the tailenders.

248 seemed a tall order but there was a look of steely resolve in the eyes of the Wanderer's batsmen - well there was until everyone had dozed off waiting for Tim to find all his equipment and his lucky Russian panda bear which his Auntie gave him as a kid - finally - the indomitable duo of Lars and Tim strode to the wicket. Everything went smoothly until Lars received a grubber. Paul and Tim then built a useful partnership but gradually The Wanderers fell behind the run rate - to make matters worse - Murdo decided to catch Bob for which he got much ribbing. Cometh the hour and all that.

The Skipper and Johnny Mortimer came together and suddenly runs began to flow (helped by a lot of wides and no balls from their skipper). Wuff nurdled the ball towards fine leg - the ball went to the same tree each time which led to a long stoppage each time as The Whalers looked for the ball.

Just when things were looking up Wuff and Johnny were out and the tail succumbed like a big girls blouse.

A valiant effort but slightly too big a target. Then to the Greyhound to tell stories of what might have happened and talk of revenge next year.

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(Despite the severity of our correspondent's headline above, which I have allowed to stand due to its peerless poetry, this was not really a bad result. Last year we conceded 230 runs and only took 2 wickets; this year they were all out for a similar score. Out of our 212 then, 125 belonged to one L N E Smith. Out of this year's 177, 8. Onwards and upwards, cricket fighters! Ed.)

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